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There’s this slutty little piece of jerkoff monkey ass that me and a couple of my phone sex brat friends like to pass around (he’s like that slutty cheerleader who wants to get gangbanged by the whole varsity team, only he’s a dude, and he wants it in his ass and the brain instead of the pussy). The best part is…he’s addicted to fucking his fist and getting fucked in the head, so we toss him back and forth like the needy little slut that he is until his wee-little-brain is spinning.

Then we toss him around some more.

He doesn’t belong to me in the sense that there’s are other brats who’ve been training his weak ass for longer, and he does have a primary owner. But, on the other hand, when he’s on the phone with ME, his ass is owned, utterly, by my voice…well, that and the inflatable butt plug he likes to ride. He says he’ll call me back later tonight, and I’m keeping him to that promise, because he knows…deep down in his tight, filled-with-come-till-the-wanna-burst balls, that if he does not call me back, there will be consequences.

The clock is ticking.

Edited to add: And look, someone else is talking about the little jerk-off-addict monkey over here! LOL.

Let’s see how this podcast goes, shall we? I have a question for all you boys….

The real thing? So much better. So give me something to laugh at.

Home again, home again, jiggity jig.

I saw that another esteemed princess who shall, for the moment, remain nameless, was using the same fairly common wordpress theme. I’d been meaning to switch my blog for a while to a 3 column format and here we are, reaping the benefits.

Speaking of reaping, I’m going to be “reaping” some wallets this evening. A certain loser of mine has been whining for weeks about his squirty little stub of a tiny penis, and how it squirts as soon as his wife touches it (poor thing). I mean the wife.

So, since it’s been a bad little penis, I’ve decided that he’s going to have to train his little sissy pussy. Why bother touching that nasty little thing anyway (we’re talking 2 inches hard, max)? The little premature ejaculator is a compulsive little masturbator, and he’s bought 3 butt plugs of varying sizes for our session tonight. I doubt I’ll let him come while he’s on the phone with his humiliation princess. There may be some chair humping, but until he learns control (orgasm control to be precise) he’s not allowed to touch it at all.

If you’re very lucky, I might later tell you what I’m going to make him do to his panties.

Anyway, I’ll be working out the kinks with this new theme, and doing a little housekeeping on my tease and denial blog here. Try to keep from coming in your panties in the meantime.

I’m about to brave the cold, and I don’t WANT to go out, but sometimes a princess must do what a princess must do. When I get home this evening, I expect three things.

1. Some absolutely sinful take out. I’m not sure what I’ll order, but I’ve got over 50 menus in my drawer of “wonderful things princess puts in her mouth”. I’m licking my lips right now thinking about it. Down boy.
2. I expect one of my boyfriends to stop by and give me another reminder of why size does matter when it comes to, well, boyfriend things.
3. I expect those of you who own dildos and butt plugs to get them out, get them ready, and for you to say, “I’m ready for my butt training, princess,” when you call me tonight. I will be available between 7pm and midnight EST, so no touching until then. If you’re afraid you might not get your call in with princess, be a smart little addict and make an appointment with princess.

   Until then, there will be no touching of your weiner. I’ll know. Yes, that means stop the touching now.

Small Penis Humiliation Definition

I’m going to bed now. I’ve had enough of watching the news people not know the story about the transit strike tomorrow. This princess may very well stay home in bed. And if this stupidity continues through the weekend, I may well visit my wrath upon you, so watch out you little gluttons for punishment. If you come looking for cruelty, I may just rip you a new one, so be careful what you wish for.

Whiny little dicked losers get my particular wrath this weekend, so if you come crawlling to me for small penis humiliation, be prepared for utter disgust.

Also, to the sweetie brit I spoke to earlier this evening, next time, I’m going to have to make you sit on my strap on, aren’t I? And I’ll expect to hear far more begging in that adorable accent.

I thought I’d share the praises my little bitches have shared lately. Try not to come in your panties if you recognize your own accolades for your phone tease denial princess here.

10/28/05 “Princess Laural was simply awesome. She knew what I needed immediately and delivered a heck of a call. Unfortunately, I prematurely exploded. I hope that she will forgive me and accept another call from me again. She is well worth your time and money. “

10/20/05 ” not only is she good but she is incredibly intelligent and manipulative “

10/05 “ran out of time but controled me like the little boy i am “
No cookie for you, stupid loser. 5 stars is the only acceptable rating for your princess, or were you too stupid from all the come I drained from you? You’re on very very thin ice with this princess

9/5/05 “As another weak-minded male who couldn’t resist temptation, I was again put in my place by this powerful young woman, making me feel smaller and weaker than ever. “
That’s from one of my weakest willed little pig boys. LOL

All of this feedback is real and easily viewable when you get on the ball and join Niteflirt like a good little bitch

I was speaking with Rick (yes, sweetie, I told you I’d write about you in here. ) today, and we were discussing exactly how it feels to back your submissive little piggie butt onto my pretty, princess strap-on cock. I won’t go into details here. . . (I save that for only the best little piggies who know how to talk properly with their prick tease princess) . . . but suffice to say, Rick’s ass is going to learn how to open for its mistress.

This, of course, got me thinking on the topic of strap ons. Now, I’m more than familiar with dildos for my own usage. I own several. No, I’m not going to tell you about them.

What I will tell you is that ipicking something that’s going inside of my tight pussy, something to actually slide inside of me…. that’s different than the kind of cock I’m going slide into my harness, outside of my jeans. It’s got to say something. My dildos I buy for feel. The dildos that I use to teach you your place? Well, let’s just say more points are awarded for style. At the moment, I’m in a crystal clear, pink mood. And today’s choice is a nice, solid one. Pretty, aint it?

Also? I want this. I want the season 2 OC box set. Now here’s a question for you. Which princess do you think I am more like? Summer, Marissa, or perhaps I’m a Julie Cooper in the making. Though I’m not white trash like her, thank god. Anyway, in order to buy me 23 hours worth of princess pampering entertainment, just click that “mail now” button you see down there. Not too much to know that you’re the one who bought me a whole weekend of entertainment to watch while I do my nails, sit around in my bathtub, suck on popsicles on the balcony and crawl into the AC to watch Ryan and Seth, my sweet, pretty boys. Don’t you want to give me that?

You know who you are. See it? Buy it. Unless some other enterprising piggie gets it first. LOL.

Click below to spoil your princess and buy her a wireless router

You asked for it, oinkers. Your very own piggy tail. Who shall be the first little piggy to wiggle his piggy tail for Laural? Your transformation is starting, and the addiction has just begun. No one will touch the little piggy’s stubby little pee-pee, will they? He’s got to roll around on the floor like a horny little animal in front of the princess, making her giggle. Wiggle piggy.

Now oink for me.

Now Buy your little piggy butt plug here